Memories of Mom and Yes, I'm OLD

Today is the 4 year anniversary of my mom's release from this earthly prison. I have not cried at all, nor do I normally on this day. I am happy that she is free at last. Free to feel good. Sure, I truly do miss her, but I am happy for her to finally be free of all the pain she felt and all her trials. Here are some pictures from the last few years she was alive and some time she spent with me.

This first picture is from 2003 when she was here in AZ visiting. She and I went with Lisa and Auntie up to a quaint, little, English tea house in Cave Creek for lunch. We all got to wear these darling hats and eat little sandwiches.

This next picture is from the first Thanksgiving after "he" left. I hadn't planned on going home for the holiday, but if I hadn't, I would have been all by myself because I think that was the year Lisa went to California for Turkey Day. So, I decided to go. Here I am with Mom and Jennifer on Thanksgiving morning getting the turkey ready to go into the oven. Mom made the stuffing and I showed her how I slather the butter all over the outside of the turkey and under the skin. That way, I don't have to baste it so much. She wasn't too sure of doing it that way, but I've never had a dry turkey yet! Jennifer was making her monkey bread/cinnamon pull aparts for breakfast. It's funny...we all look so 'lovely." Mom actually looks the best - like she'd actually already gotten ready for the day (but maybe just a little windblown). Seriously...how do these old ladies like Mom and Auntie wake up with perfect hair? Do they not move during the night?!?! (Oh, and the no-bra look along with the 'sexy' nighties...priceless.) Little did we know this would be our last Thanksgiving with Mom. I'm so glad I went...

Later in the day, Mom made her yummy ham/cream cheese/green onion rollups. Always a fave at the holidays. Sometimes, we would eat more as we were making them than would end up on the platter. No wonder I need to lose weight.

Every Fall, there is a craft show called "The Briar Patch." Lisa and I have been going to it since I moved to AZ. As time progressed, more and more of the cousins, etc. would come out for it. I think this was the largest group of us. From left to right...me (looking fabulously skinnier), Shelly (Walgren), Uncle Bob Walgren, Auntie Sigie Davis, Uncle Ward David, Mom (in the wheelchair, Auntie Tia Walgren, Wendy (Walgren) Brown, and Lisa (Davis) Tucker. We had such a fun time at the craft show. But, of course, before we went to the craft show, we all went out to breakfast. We went to IHOP and we all were laughing so hard I thought the management was going to have to ask us to tone it down. But, they didn't. This is a picture of Mom, Auntie Tia, and Auntie Sigie. All sisters. Poor Mom. She was so sick that she always looked older than her sisters who were older than her.After the Briar Patch, we all headed out to my house where we crafted the day (and night) away. The Walgrens brought these darling turkeys with benches for us to do. So cute, but SO MUCH WORK! It took us two days to do them! Mom never was much of a crafter. She always said that when they were handing out the craft talents, she was in line for ice cream. I always told her she had other kinds of talents, but sometimes, I think she was right about the crafts and ice cream. She struggled with crafts. BUT, she was a FANTASTIC teacher! She could teach a lesson like nobody else's business. A true pro. Here she is painting the leg of her turkey.This next picture was taken at Black Angus. For their 35th wedding anniversary, I flew to Utah and surprised them. Things didn't exactly work out the way I had hoped for a party and such, so we ended up just going out for dinner that night with Kevin and Jodi at Black Angus. I had such a nice time with all four of them.Mom never really was a big animal in the house person. But, she loved my bird, Tango and Tango loved her. (S)he loved to give kisses to Mom. (S)he would stick his beak up to your mouth and just kiss away. I say (S)he instead of she because we were told (s)he was a male bird when we first got him/her. However, after "he" and "I" got divorced, "he" told me that Tango was laying eggs, so I guess he is now a she...hmmmm...maybe Tango changed in that manner just like "he" did....These are definitely some good memories I have in Mom's later years. Okay, so now I'm teary-eyed and missing her....time to move on to other things....

So....lately I've been experiencing some pretty bad headaches and neck pains. I think I finally came to understand what is causing it. But, I wanted to be sure. So...I went to the eye doctor. Ever since I got these particular glasses, I've known something wasn't quite right with them. Well, it seems now that things are worse. I sit in front of a computer for 8 to 16 hours a day. Bad glasses are not a good thing for me. I've been struggling to see well the last few weeks. So, I get in to see the eye doctor and she says to me....

Dr. Lambert: So, I'm pretty sure I know what's wrong.
Me: What is it?
Dr. Lambert: Well, how old are you now?
Me (kind of shy/scared): Oh no. I just turned 40 this year. Why?
Dr. Lambert: Well, I'm afraid that I'm gonna have to use the B word....
Me (with mind in the gutter thinking, "What? She's referring to a female dog in heat?"): The "B" word?
Dr. Lambert: Yes, Bi-Focal.
Me (screaming in my mind): NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So...yeah, I'm OLD.

Apparently, everyone's right. Your eyes really do go at 40. There is a muscle in your eye that "loosens up" between 39 and 41 and if you're far-sighted like I am, your vision actually improves, but your close-up vision actually worsens. I had been noticing that I'd started doing the "zig-zag" recently, but I thought it was just related to my dumb glasses. Guess not. So...here's to my new BI-FOCALS....argh.

On my way home from the eye doctor, I made a stop at Deseret Book. I have really been trying to learn more about using my food storage rather than just storing it. I frequent these two websites a lot: http://www.everydayfoodstorage.net/ and http://www.foodstoragemadeeasy.net/. I love Everyday Food Storage because the owner, Crystal Godfrey (from Lehi, Utah, no less), does a lot of video tutorials on things she makes with her food storage. (The other one is mainly about getting your food storage and is good too.) Anyhow, Crystal has just come out with a book and so I wanted to stop and get it. I found it - $17.95+tax. Lately, C and I have really taken to Elder Hales' talk about debt and wants vs. needs, etc. I asked myself, is this a want or a need? It was kind of both! So, I bought the book. I've read a little bit of it already and it's written from a young LDS mother's perspective on food storage, but there is very wise counsel in there and good tips. I am going to continue reading on because her website truly inspires me to find ways to rotate through my food storage rather than letting it sit there and go to waste. (There was one WANT that I did purchase - they sell the BEST mint truffle bars there. Couldn't pass them up. Bought two. Yummmmmmm. So good.)

I just realized that this Saturday is National Scrapbooking Day. I think I will actually try to do some sort of scrapbooking or cardmaking or something. I need a creative outlet for myself right now. Maybe that will help!