What is it about waking up at 6 a.m. on a Sunday? My body is so used to getting up early that I rarely can sleep past 6:30 or 7 on the weekends. I guess that's actually a good thing because if I sleep past 7, I feel like I've wasted the day!
Got up, finished putting all of the inserts in the DVD cases for the Mother's Day gifts for Relief Society. Lisa called and we chatted....both of us - childless...but still mothers to our nieces and nephews...so we visited about stuff like that. Got ready for church - doing pretty well emotionally.
Got to church, found a good seat. A friend had asked me last week if I would help her with her kids today since her husband wouldn't be there and without even thinking I'd said sure. So, she arrived and handed me her baby. Here was this sweet, little precious baby in my arms - the thing I had desired above all else - my entire life - on Mother's Day. And then the opening hymn began. It was Love at Home....that wretched song my own mom used to sing to us kids to get us to stop fighting....but, now she was gone. That was it. I lost it. The combination of the baby in my arms, the song, and the thoughts of my mom....yeah, the tears freely flowed. I couldn't even sing if I'd tried. I realized that this baby in my arms was a gift to me that day - from my friend, from my mom, from the Lord. I was so GRATEFUL for this experience! I got to hold this baby the entire meeting. It was so wonderful.
We then went to Gospel Doctrine class and the lesson was on tithing. I used to always hate having lessons on tithing - because they made me feel horrible that I wasn't paying mine. Life with "him" was so hard financially that it was scary to pay tithing. I never knew if I'd have a roof over my head or a car to get me to work or whatever. Looking back now...and connecting the dots that have made up my life...I wish I'd just had the faith to do it anyway. I see the blessings that come from paying tithing, even during the hard times. It's faith that has to help get you through when you're struggling with paying it. I will share my tithing story another time.
We came home and sat down for a few minutes. Fell asleep while waiting to head to Auntie's and when the phone started ringing at 5 pm, I lept off the sofa and freaked out. We were supposed to have been to their house an hour ago! We raced to their side of town. Had slumgullion for dinner with them, visited, etc., and then, once again, it was dark! I was going to HAVE to drive home with my sunglasses on (at night). Melon Man got in front of me and I followed him home the whole way. I made it just fine, but I sure didn't like worrying that a cop was going to see me and pull me over!